Privacy Policy

The "We Promise Not to Gossip" Policy

Last Updated: When I last had coffee and thought, "I should update that policy thing."

Welcome to the least exciting but surprisingly humorous document on this website! Here's the deal with your information:

What Happens in the Contact Form Stays in the Contact Form

When you fill out that fancy contact form, I collect your name, email, and whatever message you've crafted (hopefully after coffee, not before).

Your information goes directly to my inbox, where it's treated like a VIP guest – respected, valued, and never shown around town without permission.

Fun fact: I read every message personally, often with a beverage in hand and a smile on my face. Especially the ones that start with "I have a budget."

The "No Spam" Solemn Oath

I solemnly swear that I am up to only good. Your email will never be used to send you endless promotions about extended warranties or that one weird trick that doctors hate.

I'll only reach out regarding your inquiry or to share something I genuinely think you'd find valuable – like project updates or occasionally, a really good design joke.

The Third-Party "No Invitation" Policy

Your information is not passed around like appetizers at a party. Third parties don't get access, period.

Exception: If we work together and need to involve project collaborators. But even then, it's strictly professional – like wearing a tie to a Zoom call, but only being business-appropriate from the waist up.

The "Your Rights" Reminder

You have the right to know what information I have about you, request changes, or ask me to delete it entirely from my records.

Just send me an email saying "Hey, what do you know about me?" or "Please forget I exist" – though the latter might make me a little sad.

Note: If you request deletion, I will comply, but I might keep a post-it note that says "There was once a person. They were nice. They asked to be forgotten." Just kidding. Maybe.

The "Changes to This Policy" Warning

This policy might change over time, like how my coffee order changes with the seasons. If it does, I'll update this page and the date at the top.

I won't send a newsletter about it because, let's be honest, who reads "We've updated our privacy policy" emails anyway?